Friday, September 23, 2011

How do I get my smart mouth unruly four year old to mind?

My son is four years old and super smart. My problem is he won't mind me or anyone else,he has a smart mouth,and is so hyper that I cannot seem to get control of him no matter what I try.If anyone has any answers or advice it would be greatly appreciated.|||well it's normal for four-year-olds to be a little terse, but here's what I suggest





-make sure your son hears good language


-make sure if your son watches TV / media it has good language


-make sure that people speaking to your son don't make "smart mouth" remarks... especially if it could be you in response to his. It only encourages it





form a relationship with your son in reading together, talking about a program together, etc. ask if he wants to help cooking, maybe?


if he starts acting rude and will not stop when warned, ignore him and stop anything you're doing for him





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for the love of all that is good, this is not a counseling issue unless there is more to this than we are hearing. small children are rude for awhile because they were spoiled as babies and they are being expected to do more things. The most extreme thing I'd suggest is a time-out in his room or in a chair with nothing to do for a few minutes.|||I would try taking him to a behavioral counselor. Talk with your doctor and see who they would reccomend. Every child responds diffrently to different types of correction. A counselor would be able to look at his personality type and your situation and figure out what type of punishment to use.|||Keep him away from anything containing high fructose corn syrup! I know it sounds unusual, people usually point fingers at sugar, but HFCS is way worse. It really does affect kids' behavior. You may also want to look into ADHD, if necessary.|||I understand what you are going through. This sounds like a case of ADHD. You should consider at least getting him tested for it, schools can provide you with this.


Make it very clear that sassing is bad and will not be tolerated. The only reason why he is acting like this constantly is because there has been no followthrough. He knows that he can get away with it. This can be harsh, but it's effective, as it works with my 3 year old. I ask my child if he sassed me or someone else right when he does it. I then hold his face, look him dead in the eye and tell him, "You do NOT sass me/people!" and I smack his mouth. Not the face or the cheeks. Right on the mouth. Swift and sharp, but not TOO hard. He gets the point. It has become less frequent to pretty much...he won't sass at all.


I wish you best of luck with your son. I had ADHD as a child and was put on medication. It made everything significantly better, but there is a downfall. Your child may become zombie-like after a while. I did. Docs say that Ritalin will calm a hyperactive child (although Ritalin is actually a stimulant), but they DON'T tell you that your child may lose all good aspects of his personality. He could become overly bored, won't talk, won't do anything, may lack emotions, etc. Weigh your options carefully and good luck to you!|||There is a huge difference between a spanking and a whooping... I'm not a big fan of either, but when the crime calls for a spanking, that's what my kids get.... otherwise it's a lecture or time outs or loss of priveleges... whatever the offense calls for, but just today my younger son, also 4 and smart as can be, started screaming and throwing an all out fit after preschool. I'm assuming it was because he was tired, but for whatever the cause he is responsible for his attitude, so I went to the kitchen and took out a medicine dropper, filled it with apple cider vinegar and when he opened to scream his nasty talk at me I let him have the vinegar.... it sure brought his attitude into check real quick.... I don't think I'll have to resort to that method twice!!!|||Wow, we have the EXACT SAME CHILD!! LOL My little girl is EXTREMELY intelligent, unruly, hyper and throws temper tantrums about everything. The problem with these children is because they are so smart the get easily bored and this is a new way for them to test their boundaries and see just how far they can push to get their way. I instituted a new disciplinary system for her and it seems to have helped control some of her behaviors.





We have an erasable calendar that she gets smiley faces on. When we have a good day we, together, add a smiley face to the board. If she has a bad day where there are tantrums and bad behavior such as not minding her father or me, she doesn't get the smiley for the day. Any day where she throws a temper tantrum or is extremely naughty she can actually lose smileys for the previous day, no matter how good she was!! At the end of the month we review to determine if she has enough smileys to get something she has wanted or go someplace that she likes to visit, etc. and we stick to it.





It has helped her learn consequences to not minding. Because she is so smart she fully understands that anything she does can have a negative impact on the system. No smileys, no reward!!!!





Another thing we have done is to introduce play-learning to her daily activities. She is not yet in school as I don't think she will have any benefit from pre-school because she is so advanced. We play letter regocnition games, number and addition games and things like that to stimulate her through out the day.





I don't agree with ADD or ADHD diagnosis that people are throwing out there either. A four year old is a four year old. Some are more hyper than others and MY BELIEF is a chilld that young is too young to be diagnosed with this disorder as they have not had enough exposure to the world. Some people are too quick to throw that out there when a creative and intelligent child is just expressing their boredom, lack of stimulation and frustration by acting out.

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